#993 - People who sit beside you on the bus when there are other seats available

I am a huge fan of public transit.  Before you attack me on my statement, I'm going to legal asterisk my comment by saying "In most metropolitan cities."  Public transit is cheap, accessible, and gets you where you need to go.

Of course, there are the downsides - it is crowded, it is dirty and it is often smelly.  Summer + no air conditioning + people exposing their sweaty armpits to hold onto railings while wearing no deodorant =  the breath holding skills you practiced with your siblings as a child and your parents said would never amount to anything really do come in handy.

When I worked in advertising, I'd often take the Toronto subway during off-peak hours because, well, I was at work earlier and later than your regular 9 to 5er.  Commuting at this time was perfect as seats were available throughout the subway cars and everyone had ample personal space.

Just when you think you have reached the peak of commuter nirvana as you comfortably sit three seats away from any other life form, a weirdo sits right beside you.  I'm not talking about two seats away, I'm saying ass cheek to ass cheek beside you.

You look to your left and see three empty seats.  You look to your right and (besides the one that's now occupied by Weirdo McFreakazoid) and there were three empty seats.  Really, of all the places to sit, the seat next to you was deemed the luckiest of them all by this guy?

So you're in a predicament - if you stay, you're stuck having to ride it out until one of you gets up for your stop.  If you move, you have that awkward ride of looking at each other knowing you moved because you were uncomfortable around that other person.  There's really no polite way of getting out of this one.

Plus, you were settled there first.  You put the stake in the ground that that empty area belonged to your ass and no one else's for at least a few seats.  Fuck it, you decide to move.  You're never going to see this asshole again.  You move your seat, look into your bag to see if you can score some reading material to avoid the puppy dog eyes of the guy who you just moved away from and realize you left your go-to commuting book on your desk at work.  Get ready for some awkward eye contact avoidance for the remainder of your commute.

DEEP SIGH.